Saturday, November 14, 2009

School

My first legal beer


The last week or so has been crazy....like a fox. I turned 21 which was pretty interesting to say the least. All the cool kids rode around to a few places of drink to acquire a stupendous stupor. Class the next morning with my favourite geology professor was quite interesting. I saved him a lot of roll call by counting all the people in the class (89 of 156 showed up) and he just counted the people on the sign in sheet. Ya, we definitely make a great team. Wait til he sees my review tho....hehe.

Me and my buddy Todd




Me and my hero Jen (silent but deadly)


Left to Right: Betsy, Todd, MASA!!!, some creapy dude we found on the side of the road


When the photographer is being photographed, who does the photographing? I guess we'll never know


Treva is cool as hell


Safety first!!


"3B" vision


School has been pretty easy lately. After the second wave of tests, everything pretty much stops for awhile and learning seems to cease. This works out perfect with all the work that I am getting on the farm lately. I won't bore my readers with those details though...lets just say that the milk is once again making it to the table.

I have a government professor that is really keeping things lively lately. Now that I am used to the way he talks, I can understand his mumblings enough to catch all the jokes (they are jokes, right?!?!). He is just about as liberal as a pot smoking Cocker Spaniel. Then there is this old white guy that sits front row and watches a lot of Fox news and thinks that the younger generation is worthless. This proves to be quite entertaining when talk of health care comes up. I even brought popcorn last Thursday.
I am getting A's in all my business classes that count, probably a B in my favourite geology class of all time, and I think I'm actually failing the government class. However, the entire class is also doing really bad and I'm above average by far. The questions on the review are not really questions, nor statements, nor sentences, nor even a subject and verb in some situations. This, and the fact that he is so hard to follow through a maze of off topic discussions keeps my grade a bit on the low side. I think there will be an attendance bonus to level things out...

Anyways, I also took roughly two weeks off or more from the bike after doing that ride to Mt. Scott and back. It fit in well in my time of easy schoolin' and busy work time. I rode thrice this week now and am feeling really good. Today I did 90 miles with the group and won the hill sprint into Byers for the first time since my career peak that time I beat Les several years ago (I think that happened anyways). Oh and I ate some roadkill because Todder dared me to. I didn't throw up so I think he owes me some beer or something.

Anyways one of my favourite bands is playing tonight in town! When I heard that "Between the Buried and Me" was coming to town, I realized that this place isn't quite the hicked out trash-hole that I discredited it to be in earlier times. So I best be heading that way in a few.

Special thanks to Loren for the classy photos.

Monday, October 26, 2009

Another day, another moron...

People in cars scare me. People in big trucks terrify me. It is unfortunate that so many people who drive big vehicles do not know how to properly operate such equipment, and consider themselves the sole proprietor's of the right of way.

I have come to be able to handle angry people very well from the few years that I have exercised my own right of way whilst riding the streets upon two-wheeled beauties.

So today when the teal Tundra tried to trash-tackle me with his tricky-treaded tires while on my trek into the Texaco, I tried my hand at retaining the trouble. After I parked at the pump, he pulled his pickup up and yelped pushy pouts of passion: put out to the paucity of passivity I then possessed. Angry at the *sshole, I assumed action, allowing his allocations of anxiety to accumulate. The steriods struck his soul mercilessly, sticking sounds of his symptoms strongly into his speech. Stealing away from the station, I struck a cord against his concordia - though cautious - careful to keep from creating catastrophe. With my footsteps towards his truck, he powered away, as strangely as he had come.

So I wrote this rhyme to reveal my recent realization:
A redneck on 'roids with road rage is rediculously retarded; runs his Ram around ridicules of reality.

Oh and for the record, I got 44.4 mpg. I wonder where the decimal was placed in this particular rednecks numerals?

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Bicycle Race

I went up to Purcell, OK this weekend for some cyclocross fun. The race went absolutely horrible....um, let's just say that I got a flat and leave it at that... other than that my only complaint was that the directions on the flyer were absolutely horrible. I know I'm not the best at following directions, but these were the worst directions I've ever tried to follow. I got to the race 10 minutes before the start, changed clothes as quicly as possible, and was on the line after registering right before they blew the whistle.

Anyways the real adventure was on the drive home. I was pretty p*ssed about the race so I decided to just randomly drive in a southerly direction and see some countryside. Oh I guess I didn't mention that the CX race was at 9pm at night...so ya a pretty nice course in the dark despite how crappy I did I do have to say. So I'm driving home and going through this pitch black portion on the highway to Duncan, OK and I see this car pulled off on the shoulder. I decided that I would pull over and help, thus fulfilling my daily good deed. It turned out to be two grody okie women, drunk out of their minds. Ironically enough, I didn't even know that they were drunk until they told me that they were, as their accents and inbred tendencies made their actions seem normal...

Anyways one was a 27 year old mother of two, living with her ex-husband. The other was a 41 year old who was the younger's aunt by blood and by marriage, according to the younger. I'm not exactly how that works out, but for the record, that is how she explained it, so I will leave it at that. They were on their way to Duncan to "party" with the older lady's ex-husband. I didn't ask too many questions, I was just trying to take it all in so that I could write a top-notch blog post.

Their car was basically cooked. The younger's ex-boyfriend had drained the oil...I'm not sure if he was in jail or not yet at this point in the story.



So with my bike in the back they had to both pile in the front seat of my Yaris for the drive back in the opposite direction to Davis, OK. It was only 15 miles but it was interesting to say the least. I started getting questions myself of course and the younger kept hitting on my, etc. They asked me how many kids I had, and when I said none they were fairly surprised. "Well ain't you got any kin-folk?" So anyways here is my story as it played out: I am a 23 year old hay and cattle farmer from Wichita Falls. I was driving my wife's car, whom I had been married to for about a year and had not had any kids with yet. I was coming home from OKC where my mother lives with her second husband because my father died a few years ago. That was pretty much the gist of it, and I'm pretty sure that the wife comment saved me from some unmentionable unpleasantries. All in all I only lost about 30 minutes and got $5 out of the deal when I dropped them off at the casino in Davis so that they could meet up with the 41 YO's mother.

All in all it was a great day. I think I'll be going back to this race next season!!!

Another thing that I have noticed...
If you are a conservative in the north or midwest, you are pro-ethanol because it creates jobs and raises the price of corn for the farmers. If you are a conservative in the south, you are anti-ethanol because you think that it supports foreign countries and also because they drill oil on the land that you squat on, and for some reason that helps you. Just another ironic difference that I have noticed. But who is right? What do you think...is ethanol good or bad? Why do you hate/love ethanol? Please write me your opinions because I'd love to blog about this mindless none-sense.

Saturday, October 17, 2009

Bicycle Ride

I think I've said this a time or two before, but I just got done with the best ride of the year. But the word "best" is a relative term, of course. I guess I can't say it was the most epic ride of the year...but it was indeed quite epic.

Anyhoo, Todd and I rode to Mt. Scott and back (almost) today. It came out to around 145 miles with 9.5 hours of ride time. We were on our bikes from about 8:30am until about 7:15pm or so, about the time it was getting dark. We had a flat that took forever to change and a few more stops on the way up. We got into the Wichita Mountains park and shortly later got the run down from the Park ranger. If you have ever been up to Mt Scott with me, you know that I HATE the park ranger because he always seems to find something to give me crap about. I'm pretty sure that I have a problem with the park ranger up there about 60% of the time. Well today he told us that we couldn't ride two abreast. We were thinking, "whatever, we don't care...sure" but then he goes on to tell us that it was a state law that cyclist ride two abreast...which is obviously BS. So I kinda half way questioned him, but just ignored him when he restated his lie. Later on the ride out of the park we rode two abreast right past the cop and he didn't say anything, so I guess he can't legally back himself up with a ticket.





Anways we rode into Medicine Park for a coffee stop and to laugh at rednecks. The way back we only stopped once in Cache for water. We had a tailwind on the ride back (15mph avg on the way out against the wind) so we were averaging over 20mph easy until about Grandfield or so when we started to hit the wall and slow down a good bit. The problem is that there really isn't anywhere to stop out there for food so we kinda messed up there for a bit. I have never been so happy to be in Burkburnett in my life....and I now have a greater appreciation for Whataburger. We pulled in and I had a bacon cheeseburger and a coke. The coke was pretty ice cold so with the temperature dropping as the sun went down I started to get really cold. We had planned to finish the last few miles in the dark using Todd's nog's but as soon as we stepped out I was shaking uncontrollably and erratically. It was about time that I call for a ride, and I don't regret the decision. I didn't need the extra ten miles that bad.

Anyways, my mom made me and Todd some chicken and rice and some kickass cake. So we took showers and I drove Todd back home. Then I was still pretty awake from all that Coke I drank in Burkburnett, so I went to the MSU football game and remembered why I think football is so retarded so I left.

oh, and NO I did not ride up the most over-rated mountain in all of recorded history today.

The end.

Friday, October 16, 2009

High Quality Firewood For Sale!!!

Split, seasoned firewood for sale, cut to your specification: $100 per truck-load delivered and stacked. One load is over a rick.

We also have Oak and Pecan available for $110 per tuck-load.

Mesquite wood available.

If you would like to come out and pick up a load yourself we will come up with a price depending on quantity.

940-855-2529

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Coffee for Cattle

My government class was cancelled this morning, so I had a good hour to "people watch" at the school Star Bucks. Watching people candidly rush to get their coffee inspired a blog post.

While the Star Bucks worker was out the door smoking a cigarette an amiable customer with a frat pull-over walks up and looks all around for the coffee lady. He stood there waiting for five minutes twittling his fingers and hopping around anxious for his coffee. His frat brother, the son of a rich local diplomat, walks up and they have a conversation of complaint about the bad service and past bad service that they'd had in other situations. The rich son shrugs his shoulders and walks over to talk to a dumb blond. Frat boy stand there a few more minutes before giving up temporarily.

A minute or so later an older guy walks up, quite possibly the guy who is in his midlife crisis. He then had a non-verbal freak-out when he couldn't locate the coffee lady, who could be easily seen if one were to peer out the glass door. The man looked up and down all over behind the counter for the lady for about 30 seconds, but luckily for him she was on her way back in around that time. He ordered something girly like a mocha hot chocolate with extra cinnamon. At this point a girl walks up and gets in line, much to the chagrin of frat boy #1, who has lost two spots in line all of a sudden. Looking annoyed, he stands third in line while the boyfriend of the girl in front of him cuts in to flirt with the girl. Soon the line grows two more, and suddenly I get the image in my head of cows lined up at the milk parlor...or packing plant.

The frat boy ordered a skim milk latte and a snickers bar. I couldn't help but to laugh a little. It is amazing how people can be in such a stressful hurry to get to something that is supposedly an enjoyable experience. Why not chill out like the coffee lady who gracefully takes a smoke break?

Monday, October 12, 2009

Creativity that keeps your butt dry

Sometimes to keep the interest in training alive late in the season, it is nice to do something new to your bike to make yourself feel cool...or in this situation, something old.
I drove my car to school too many times last week only for a bit of rain. With the coming rain this week I decided to sweeten up the old fixie with a quick addition. I took the chain guard from my motorized bike (that would have never fit...) and adapted it to work as a fender for my rear wheel. Now I can ride all the way to school with a dry behind. You'll be jealous when you see it.